TRUST
I recently had a private discussion with a trainer about the meaning of trust in relation to horse training. Our discussion has led me to think it might be a good time to revisit the topic for readers of this page. This essay was first published in 2020. I hope you don’t mind reading it again.
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Trust. I want to talk about a horse’s trust.
I hear all the time from people that they have an amazing relationship with their horse and their horse has tremendous trust and will do anything. They tell me their horse loves them and loves the work.
If you are one of those people, let me say that I believe you believe it, but I also believe you are wrong.
I know this is controversial and I know it will upset some people, but I also believe that I am telling the truth.
In my opinion, trust is so misunderstood among horse people. From my studies over many decades, I am confident in saying that even the greatest masters, past and present, fail to understand the concept of trust in a horse’s relationship with a human. Because they failed to understand it, they have also failed to teach it. And that’s why I doubt none of us truly get it.
The issue is that what most of us view as a horse’s trust in us, is actually what can be termed contractual trust. That is, we have a contract with our horse that if it fulfils certain obligations we will meet certain promises. They trust us to meet those promises. It’s a mutually understood contract. Virtually every aspect of training is intended to explain to our horse the terms of the contract. We explain what we expect from them and what they can expect from us if they meet their obligations. Likewise, we explain what they can expect from us if they don’t meet those obligations. It’s a contract and training teaches horses the terms of the contract and to trust in the contract.
Every trainer works horses with the intent of teaching them the terms of the contractual trust – Xenophon, Baucher, Dorrance, Hunt, Parelli, Pluvinel, Brannaman, Rarey, Oliveira, etc. All of them! Including you and me.
But that’s not what most people mean when they say, “My horse loves the work and trusts me. He will meet me at the gate and wants me to put the bridle on him. He follows me everywhere. He whinnies when I ride the other horse because he is jealous. He does everything I ask.”
You know the sort of thing people say. Perhaps you say those things about your horse.
When people say those types of things, they always mean the trust is unconditional. Instead of thinking it’s a contractual trust; they think it’s an open-ended trust with no terms. In their hearts, they believe they have a trust that is not reliant on any contractual terms. But they are wrong.
Let me explain the difference a bit more.
When you apply for a job, there are certain terms and obligations that you and your employer agree to. You agree to fulfil the obligations laid out in the job description, to work the hours, to wear proper attire, to behave in certain ways, etc. In return, your boss agrees to pay a specific salary, offer several holiday weeks, cover work-related expenses, provide a safe environment, etc. You and your employer trust that the other will meet their obligations. If the obligations are not met by either party the trust is broken and there will be negative consequences. To avoid the negative consequences both parties work to maintain the terms of the contract. That’s contractual trust. The trust only extends as far as the terms of the contract are adhered to.
In the case of trust between horse and human, it works similarly. For example, I train my horse to load into a trailer by explaining to him that if loads without resistance I promise not to apply an uncomfortable pressure. On the other hand, if he exhibits resistance I promise to apply pressure. Those are the terms of the contractual trust. My horse trusts me to the limit of the contract outlined in the way I trained him. In time, my horse becomes so good at loading into trailers that it appears he is happy to load and even likes going in and being taken places. When this happens I proclaim to the world that my horse loves being trailered, hates it when I leave him behind, loves going places and trusts me completely.
But it is not true. The trust that I think is completely 100% is not open-ended, it is a fantasy and is still limited by the terms of our contract. I know this because when my horse baulks about loading into a friend’s trailer or in a different bay or with another horse, I go back to using some form of pressure.
In an ideal world, we should be working towards open-ended trust. This is where our trust is not dependent on an understanding of the obligations of the horse and where the horse’s trust is not dependent on knowing there are no positive and negative consequences to their behaviour.
I hope you can see why open-ended trust is so elusive and why nobody in the horse industry talks about it, even though we all believe we have it or are working towards having it.
Contractual trust between horse and human limits the trust to the terms of the obligations. It can appear to be limitless, but that’s an illusion that people want to believe about the quality of the relationship they have with their horse.
Open-ended trust has no limits and is not dependent on a horse or human meeting specific obligations. It’s what we all like to think we have or will have one day.
I don’t think open-ended trust can come from training alone, although training must contribute to the process. I think it also has to come from living with a horse and being part of its day. I think we need to be part of their life when they are grazing, drinking, shitting, spooky, playing, sleeping, fighting, running, confused, angry, playful, worried, happy, anxious, and relaxed. We need to be as much part of their life as the tail hanging off their butt. Not just the human trainer, but an important presence in all aspects of their life.
For most of us, playing that big a role in a horse’s life is impractical and even impossible. We have to settle for the training and riding sessions that our busy lives allow. Unfortunately, that means we never get past the contractual trust phase. But it doesn’t mean it’s not worth trying our best to turn our horse’s trust into an open-ended trust. I’m not giving up.